The Unlikely Organic

I’ve neglected you internet (read: my two friends that read this blog) but I have good reasons. Sloth, laziness, perceived personal tragedies, and an inability to be creative and entertaining beyond the confines of my small life. I am back, however, with a vengeance, to regale you with tales of organic eating, living a greener life, and making sure the dog doesn’t eat things meant for the recycling bin.

Here are a few easy changes you can make to lessen your carbon footprint, and feel completely, ridiculously, and epicly superior to everyone you know:

• Get rid of plastic wrap and replace it with aluminum foil. A bit of a pain in the ass? Yes–but totally doable. Just make sure your recycling company takes foil, not all do.
• Are you a cheap wino? If you are, good for you, those screw tops from those bottles of Kool-Aidesque Malbec are aluminum. Toss ’em in your bin after a good rinse.
• If you MUST have plastic sandwich and quart bags, use the recyclable ones, even if they cost a bit more. You are saving all that money on cheap wine. Live a little.
• Cut sulfates out of your life. Even Dr. Oz, the apple of my mother’s eye, agrees with me. They are not only terrible for you, but can have devastating effects on the environment. Widely available eco-friendly dish soap, dishwasher tablets and fluid, laundry detergent, shampoos, conditioners, and body washes are available.  Make a better choice. Or make your own.
• Wash your damn dishes. Paper plates are easy and convenient and entirely wasteful. Plastic utensils are an abomination, and you know it; ask for your take out without them.

You know I'm not a single serving right? Just kidding. Get yourself a big glass.